Wednesday, May 11, 2011

Continental Asians Who Hate Disney

In a pre-emptive action to keep a Middle Eastern-styled 'Jasmine Revolution' from taking hold in their country's enormous (quantitatively speaking) young populace, the overbearing censorship-happy authoritarian Chinese government is banning jasmine-related things.  They've already banned access to a video clip of their own President singing a Jasmine-themed (no relation to the Revolution) song.  Reports suggest that actual Jasmine Flowers are soon to be banned, with extreme members of the government suggesting a ban on production of the ubiquitous Jasmine Rice, and some even going so far as to call for a halt to Jasmine Tea production (lest their impressionable youths get drunk on the subtle flavor of the flowery flames of populist revolution).  I've even read that they have recalled and stopped the sale of all forms of Disney's Alladin, citing ther a stream of subtext throughout the film encouraging their kids to rise against the establishment and fight against all odds for the Jasmine [Revolution].

Folks, in this era of cloned sheep, genetically modified vegetables, Justin Beiber's hairdo, and other crimes against nature, this beast was bound to rear its head given time.  Finally, the world has birthed Asians who will not be flicking V-signs wearing Mickey Mouse shirts as they go through customs at LAX (a-la that scene from the adequate Tom Hanks movie  'The Terminal').

Perhaps the Chinese government should have been tipped off to the film's true message when the Mandarin-Language DVD release was postponed after Disney recalled this original cover.